kissa you

ramblings of a hopeful romantic | 🎨 art blog: | ☕ commissions:

lore dni
posted this
Time ago

well. time to see if that series of events actually has any sort of impact on my relationship with these people. im hoping that its a positive one. you know. gotta think positive. i consider myself an optimist. like... regardless of whatever the fuck is the uh short term evolution of my relationship with them, i have complete faith that somehow ill figure out how to work things out for myself and the people i love. long term. i have faith in myself that im gonna do my best to make that happen. i can picture it perfectly, me 10 years from now, or hell even 5 years, who knows, it could happen, surrounded by people that i love, and im like: yeah right when i hit 20 The Plague descended upon us and like many others my life became absolute shit hell. but look at us now. we made it and things are so much better now. like. that is going to happen, even if i only reach that point 15 years from now instead of 10, and im willing to do crazy shit to get there. but now? short term? ive already done my best. and i will continue to do my best. but you know. its a two way thing. and im just hoping that the traffic on the other lane is not a complete disaster. thats all. like. any improvement is improvement. i think positive and my standards are minimal. i gotta let go. i cant control the thoughts and feelings and actions and reactions of anyone other than myself. it is what it is. i feel like i have to tell myself that more often. "it is what it is". cause its true. and honestly, i need a break and deserve a break. so yeah.